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Two of a Kind
Deadpool Fanfiction: Chapter One Scene: Down town Manhattan Deadpool perched on top of an apartment building waiting for his assignment to appear. Deadpool: *singing* Sitting on top of an apartment building; Somebody typing my words. Here with a rifle; Someone is gonna get hurt. They say I'm crazy but they don't understand; That I'm the sanest person here so faaaaaaarrrr! A shady looking man stepped out of the shadows. Deadpool: Ah, hello Mr. Anderson. *BAM* The man fell over and people started running in every direction. Deadpool: *mimicking Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice* You are terminated, time to head for cover. Deadpool slipped the rifle back into his gun bag, went down the fire escape and into his apartment window. He flopped down on his worn out sofa and clicked the 'ON' button on his remote control. *CLICK* Nothing. *CLICK* Nothing. Deadpool: *throws the remote into the trash can across the room* Only entertainment I can get around here. He pulled out his cell phone and looked at his EHarmony profile. No replies. His phone started to ring. Deadpool: *cocks head to one side* Unknown caller? *groans* Better not be another prank call. *taps 'Accept' button* Yollo. ???: Oh my gosh, you actually answered! Deadpool: Look, if this is a prank call th- ???: It's not! I swear to you it's not! I'm actually a really big fan of yours. And trust me, you are my favorite out of all the super heroes in my dimension. Deadpool: 'Dimension'? Who is this? ???: I'm about to knock on you door. '' *KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK* Deadpool: *gets up and walks across room, slowly opens his apartment door* Uh.... He opened up the door to a woman about his age, who was practically gorgeous. ???: Hi, I'm Cassy. Chapter Two Scene: Deadpool's Apartment where we just met Cassy Deadpool stared at Cassy studying her. Amber eyes and hair, likes to wear t-shirts and blue jeans and tennis shoes, tries to keep clothes loose, but her perfections make them look tight. Deadpool: Hi, I'm D- Cassy: Deadpool, A.K.A. Wade W. Wilson. I know, like I said, I'm a really big fan! ''She's perky, in both ways! Deadpool thought. Deadpool: Want to come in? Cassy: Sure. *walks in* Deadpool: *closes door and kicks aside some trash* Sorry about the mess. Cassy: I don't mind, I lived in a much worse place than this. Deadpool: How do you know me? Do you work for S.H.I.E.L.D.? Cassy: No, I came from another dimension. Deadpool: I know a few people who come from other dimensions. Cassy: You mean the Deadpool Corps? Yeah, I know, but except in my dimension, we have no superheroes, well, except in movies and comic books. Deadpool: Seriously? None? Cassy: Yep. Sucks really. Deadpool: But why me? Don't you have somebody else in mind? Thor? Captain America? Iron Man? Cassy: No, I was never interested in them, and now Thor and Iron Man are both going to be girls and Captain America is going to be, well..... Black... Deadpool: *stares at her* Seriously? Cassy: 'Fraid so. Country too, YES! Deadpool thought again. Cassy: Basically, your the only superhero who knows what's going on. You know your being watched and being controlled like a puppet. Too bad your daughter doesn't see the world the way you do. Deadpool didn't understand. How did Cassy know about his daughter, Ellie? Deadpool: You know about Ellie? Cassy: Yea, and your wife, Shiklah. Deadpool: Ex wife. She asked me to choose between her or Ellie, and I chose Ellie. Cassy: She was cool in The Gauntlet comics, but about your Deadpool and Original Sin comics, she was becoming a jerk. Deadpool: Yeah, I guess. He went to clean a part of the sofa off for Cassy to sit on. He sat on the other end of it. Deadpool: How did you get here? Cassy: I got here by going through a portal I discovered in the woods behind my house. I was the only one who went back there. But when I figured out it could send me here, I took the chance. Deadpool: So you can go back whenever you want? Cassy: *lets out sad sigh* Unfortunately, no. I can probably stay here for about 2 weeks then I have to go back to the portal before it closes for like 6 years. Well, there goes my 'might be girlfriend', Deadpool thought. Cassy: But I want to hang out with you in those two weeks. Deadpool: And do what? Cassy: I don't know, go on missions, see the world, get a good look at how it is to be you. Deadpool: Hey, I don't know how it is to be me. Cassy: But that's the thing. You know how everybody thinks your crazy or psychotic? Acting like your friends when they wished you would either go away or stop talking? Deadpool: They think that? Cassy: Sadly, yes. Deadpool: I guess. Cassy: That's how people treat me in my world. Deadpool: *looks away shyly and scratches back of head* Whoa. *RING RING RING* Deadpool: That's the guy who hired me for my job I just did. *taps 'Accept'* Mark! Hey what's up man. Mark: Deadpool, I hope you got Baroni killed. Deadpool: Yes, Mark. I got Baloni killed. Mark: Not Baloni it's- *frustrated sigh* Never mind, I'll send over your four and a half grand tomorrow. Deadpool: 'Four and a half'? Mark, we agreed on five grand. Mark: I know, but I owed some body else alot of money and I had to take some from your pay check. Please forgive me man. Please! Deadpool: I want my money Mark, if I don't get all of my five grand you know what happens when I don't get my full pay. Mark: Come on Deadpool! My wife left me and all I have is my daughter. Are you going to kill a little girl's father? Deadpool: *sigh* I know how you feel Mark, fine. I'll let you give me that four and a half tomorrow, but as soon as you get the other half thousand you give it to me. Not any one else. Me. Mark: Thank you so much Deadpool! Thank you. God bless you. '' Deadpool: Talk to ya later Mark. *BEEP* Deadpool: *sticks phone in back pocket* Sorry, had to settle some buisness. Cassy: I don't mind. Kinda nice what you did for him. Deadpool: Yeah, I don't know what's over coming me. Maybe it's just because I'm a father now and I want what's best for Ellie. Cassy: Everything you do is best for her. *KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK* Deadpool: Now what? *walks over and opens door to Director Colson* Colson? What are you doing here? Cassy: Did you just say 'Colson'? Like the Colson? Colson: We picked up readings somewhere down town in an alley. Like some type of inter-dimensional portal. Something or someone got out of it and we tracked it to here. Cassy: Oh, yeah. That's my fault. *comes up beside Deadpool* I kinda went through it in my world. Colson: *staring at Cassy with a strange expression* Wade, you need to get her to safety. Now. Deadpool: What for? Colson: HYDRA and A.I.M. will stop at nothing to get there hands on a portal like that. We already tried going through it but we couldn't. The world on the other side will only welcome ones not of it's kind if only all beings of that world are on that side. Deadpool: So, what does that deal with Cassy? Colson: In order for HYDRA and A.I.M. to get through that side of the portal, they need her. *CRASH* Five HYDRA Agents crashed through the windows of Deadpool's apartment. Before Deadpool could react, Cassy grabbed one of Deadpool's pistols and shot the closest two in the the head, shooting the other three in the legs. She went over and broke all of their necks. ''That's it, Deadpool thought, I'm hooked. Cassy went back and stuck the pistol back in the holster she got in out of. Colson: Well, that was different. Cassy: My dad taught me self defense since I was eight. Deadpool: Eight? Isn't that a little young? Cassy: Not when you're a country girl. We were taught that when somebody messes with you, hit 'em where it hurts most. Deadpool: I'll take you to to Agent Preston's house. Colson: Deadpool, I want you to protect that girl with your life. Deadpool: Don't worry, nothing will happen to her. Colson: You better hope not.